Sent: Thursday, October 26, 2000 3:29 AM
Subject: Gore Praises Texas!
Dear Fred Hoot,
And now for some more humor, direct from the desk of David Letterman, as read by George W. Bush:
Top Ten Changes I'll Make In The White House
10. To save taxpayer dollars, calls to winning sports teams will be collect
9. New rule at cabinet meetings -- you can't talk until you ride the mechanical bull
8. Goodbye boring presidential radio address -- hello "Dick Cheney Spins The Hits of the 80's, 90's and Today"
7. Make sure the White House library has lots of books with big print and pictures
6. Just for fun, issue executive order commanding my brother Jeb to wash my car
5. First day in office my mother's face goes up on Mount Rushmore
4. Look into hiring a security guard for our nuclear secrets
3. Will not get sick on Japanese leaders like other President Bushes I know
2. Give Oval Office one heck of a scrubbing
1. Tax relief for all Americans -- except smart aleck talk show hosts
And now for something equally amusing...
Why does Al Gore say one thing, when the truth is another?
Take for instance Gore's attacks on the Texas record. Looks like he had a different opinion in a White House press release. Look what Calvin Woodward of the Associated Press had to say about Gore's stand on the Texas record:
"After all the bad things Al Gore has been saying about the state of George W. Bush's Texas, it seems conditions there are on the mend after all.
Says who? The Clinton-Gore administration.
The White House has a Web section listing "Clinton-Gore administration accomplishments" state by state. Some of the headlines for Texas sound like a campaign ad that could be run by Gov. Bush, the Republican presidential candidate, and not at all like the Texas that Gore is describing in his Democratic campaign.
The White House says of the state:
-"More high-quality teachers with smaller classes for Texas' schools."
-"Crime falls 15 percent in Texas."
-"496,746 fewer people on welfare."
-"Health care for nearly 50,900 uninsured Texas children."
-"More toddlers are being immunized."
-"Child support collections up 178 percent."
-"2,005,800 new jobs."
-"Homeownership has increased in Texas."
-"11 toxic waste sites cleaned up."
-Calvin Woodward, Associated Press
THE MOST IMPORTANT FACT TO REMEMBER:
12... days until the election.
PLEASE PASS THIS ON TO ALL YOUR FRIENDS!
Republican National Committee
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